I live in a state of limbo. I’m in love with someone who I’m not dating and is far away. I’m working two jobs that I deem to be temporary, and I’m living with my parents. I’m an artist who doesn’t create. I’m a lover who shows no affection to her beloved. I am someone who cares a great deal about the world around her, but doesn’t lift a finger to better it. I tell myself that it’s temporary. This isn’t really my life. That’s why little things like this tickle me so much. In the very instant that I was thinking of the object of my affection and wondering in my head, “are we ever going to work out?” (this vein of thought is constantly running through my head….”am I really being a pathetic fool now?”, “will he ever realize that I’m the best out there for him?”, or “has he changed so much that he really would be happier with someone decidedly unlike me?”), I looked down at my feet and glinting in the spring sun was this bottle cap. Granted, it’s a beer cap, but it does bear the initials of me and this particular gentleman…and I’ll take the sign in whatever form it comes. Some things make sense together. In that little moment, in the soon-to-be-summer-sun, I felt that the permanence of our two initials coming together, and for a few more steps felt confident that in time things would work out. *grin* No wonder I never seem to run out of hope…I am replenished with a littered bottle cap!
I hope all ya’ll can find hope in something so small too. =)
loves!
elle

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